Societal Regression & the Child-Focused Society

Societal Regression & the Child-Focused Society

What Happens When Helicopter Parents
Are Hit by Boomerang Children?

“If you keep doin’ what you’ve been doin’,
you’ll keep gettin’ what you’ve been gettin’.”

Societies vary in functional levels of differentiation and amount of chronic anxiety in a manner similar to families and individuals. Emotionally reactive behaviors in a societal context follow the same attack – defend, pursue – withdraw interactions as do familial relationships. Coalitions and group conflict are analogous to fusion and cut-off.

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Rituals Through Time and Space

Rituals Through Time and Space

Why Go Directly to Cinco, Start With Dos

“Rituals have the power to mark
or to move us
through transitions.”
— Rabbi Roni Handler
Prayers from the Heart

Evan Imber-Black has written the following “working definition of ritual”:

Rituals are coevolved symbolic acts that include not only the ceremonial aspects of the actual presentation of the ritual, but the process of preparing for it as well.

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The Last Quarter: Part I – The Predicament

The Last Quarter: Part I – The Predicament

Reflection and Acceptance

“Do not be afraid.
Do not lose resolve.”
— Deuteronomy (1:21)   דברים

A friend and colleague who has chosen to remain nameless wondered how does one do the “work” of self-differentiation or “growing oneself up” in the “last quarter” of life? Given ever-increasing longevity, health related quality of life (HRQoL), and the widening circle of multigenerational caretaking, we might wonder what exactly constitutes the last quarter? Does it start with the 6th, 7th, 8th or 9th decade of our lives? Regardless, by the time we have reached this stage, and certainly before we are done passing through it, we will have encountered most (if not damn near all) of the normative life-cycle transitions and many unexpected, unplanned for crises.

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Divorce and the Family Relationship Process

Divorce and the Family Relationship Process

Bridging Emotional Cutoff from a Former Spouse “And you may ask yourself -Well…How did I get here? And you may ask yourself How do I work this?” — Talking Heads — Once In A Lifetime I can sense the exasperated sighs, see the rolled eyes, ears, nose and mouth, and…

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In the Best Interests of the Children

In the Best Interests of the Children

Problems with a “Child-Focused” Approach What would it take to sit with one’s own anxiety rather than passing it along to someone else? How often do we as parents make projects out of our children when we’d be better off making projects of our relationships and ourselves? In “We Don’t…

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Doing “Bowen”
Turning Theory into Practice

Doing “Bowen”<br>Turning Theory into Practice

“There’s nothing so practical
as a good theory”
— Kurt Lewin

We all carry unresolved problems from past life cycle stages with us, into our current situations. At times of family life-cycle transitions and unexpected crises, conflict and dysregulation arise. Questions about how best to respond include: (1) What can you do to help resolve the conflict, reduce stress and anxiety, improve communication, and promote active problem solving and healing? (2) How do you maintain both your autonomy and the connections with emotionally important people in your life? (3) Which behaviors will help make things better no matter what anyone else does? and (4) How do you deal with differences without loosing connection?

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Preventative Maintenance

Preventative Maintenance

What sort of psychological preventative maintenance and regular check-ups will help foster our children’s resilience, the ability to withstand and rebound from stressful disruptive crises that interrupt developmental tasks? What enables some young people to do well in school, form meaningful relationships and feel hopeful about the future in spite of adversity, while others become depressed and/or self-destructive?

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Conscious Uncoupling

Conscious Uncoupling

It’s Not About Gwyneth Paltrow
(It’s Not Even About Katherine Woodward Thomas)

—- and there is nothing new under the sun
— Kohelet 1:9

‘Conscious Uncoupling’ is not a new concept one. Twenty years ago Constance Ahrons, in her book The Good Divorce: Keeping Your Family Together When Your Marriage Comes Apart told the following anecdote:

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Individual Therapy from a Family Perspective

Individual Therapy from a Family Perspective

How is Bowen Theory Coaching different from all other family therapies?

And why should you care?

As paradoxical as it may sound, the majority of family therapists have an individualistic orientation, while Bowen Theory coaches and therapists help individuals from a family relationship perspective. So Family Therapy with One Motivated Family Member is not an oxymoron. Who knew?

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Bowen Family Systems Coaching


Bowen Family Systems Coaching with Ronald B Cohen, MD is the treatment of choice for complicated relationship problems and intergenerational conflicts. Include the whole family in resolving and improving what is going on right NOW! When the entire family works to make the difficult journey together, the results are almost magical.
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Why Ronald B Cohen, MD?


If you are experiencing family relationship problems and distress, don’t treat all therapists alike. Look for a Family Therapist who has had specific training, is comfortable with emotional intensity and will offer clear direction to help resolve identified problems. Ronald B. Cohen, MD works with the whole family in a manner that can save you time and be more cost effective than equal doses of individual therapy.
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For Mental Health Professionals


I offer both individual coaching and a consultation group to help facilitate the acquisition and further development of knowledge and expertise in Bowen Family Systems Theory and Coaching for the enhancement of clinical efficacy, productivity and satisfaction. If this is something you want to do professionally, and especially if you have not had significant training and experience in working with family dynamics and relationships, then experiential learning by doing is the best way to go.
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